Watch the entire “Let It Go” scene from Frozen featuring Idina Menzel performing as Elsa.
Good lord!! that must be a sign of a great actor!! to have such a range of emotion in just one look!! Not that you had to sell me on his acting skills but damn!!
people say i love you all the time - when they say, ‘take an umbrella, it’s raining,’ or ‘hurry back,’ or even ‘watch out, you’ll break your neck.’ there are hundreds of ways of wording it - you just have to listen for it, my dear.
I saw the movie Gravity last night. I went to it by myself which I had put off going because I could work out going with anybody so I finally decided to just go by myself. I always tell myself that I need to get over the need to have someone with me to go see a movie at the theaters because what’s the difference? It’s not like I’m going to be talking with anybody during the movie? Also it’s not the first movie I’ve gone to by myself but it’s not something that I do often. I really should do it. I need to embrace being able to do things by myself. Not because I’m a lonely person or that I’m a loner, even though I might be those things, I think I’m still trying to figure that out, but just as something of building myself. I don’t need others to make me or define my happiness. I saw Gravity last night and it was amazing and frankly going by myself to a late show on a Tuesday night was most likely the best way to see it! There was hardly anyone in the theater and I was able to immerse myself into the film. It added to the feelings of the film and I was free to feel how ever I wanted. If I had seen it with someone I would have been worried about hiding how much I was crying when I was watching parts of the movie. (side note: I cry a lot when I watch movies. It’s a fact I’ve tried to fight about myself but I’m a crier. Even if the movie isn’t said I find myself moved by something. Not just movies, T.V. shows, moving blogs, news articles, just about anything could get me going. But I like to put off the vibe that I don’t cry but in fact I do all the time for just about any emotion I feel.)
So after that I choose to sleep in today. I haven’t been able to do that in a long time. The first time I’ve been able to and allowed myself to go to bed with out an alarm set. I had a lecture I should have gone to today, but I decided that I needed some down time because I haven’t had any down time that I wasn’t riddled with guilt about not doing something. Not that I didn’t feel guilty today but I choose to not dwell on it as much as normal. It was nice and then after sleeping in, having some time to just lounge around, watch some netflix and be in my pjs for most of the day I finally took a shower and dove back into what needed to be done. A lot of things have been neglected and I am now ready get back into the fight of life or something? Between having two jobs which I rarely have a day go by where I’m not at one of them, and school I have no time to just get done. Sadly just having two jobs alone has been making me neglect school, which should be number one. Not that my jobs are exactly life consuming, well one may have been for a while but I had recently decided to just change a mental thought on it and let it go because I have more important things to focus on. But yes school had fallen on a back burner because once going to work and some days work then school, homework and my online classes seem like the last thing I want to deal with when I get home. I feel so drained that just coming home to do more work is just a horrible feeling. I haven’t been able to do anything outside of it with out feeling guilt about it. Also I’m lucky to get anything done these days. There are a lot of social things I’ve missed out on because I can’t get enough of a break from work/school to make them. I’ve been trying to get my hair cut for weeks but my schedule has been keeping me from it. But none the less, after taking most of the day for myself I have a new feel for things. I have for the last several hours been working on school work and realizing that something that I thought was just over whelming and I thought there was no way I was going to make it through is now breaking down in to something that I find doable.
I recently this week asked for less hours at one of my jobs so I could have more time out of work to focus on school/myself so hopefully that will come through and it will help greatly. Even if it doesn’t I have come to learn that I just need to keep this feeling of knowing this is possible to get through in my head. There is a finish line and it’s in sight, but I also need to take precautions to make sure I don’t burn myself out before hand. I need to make sure I remind myself of what I want, all my goals and dreams need to be in my mind constantly and I have started to set up little reminders around for myself to keep me motivated. I can and will get past this horrible weird part of my life that is a terrible limbo. I will move on and look back at this time period as something I survived from, and be glad it’s over. Until then I just push on, and trying to remember to take pit stops along the way to keep my sanity and also to take moments to make personal growth because if I don’t do that then all of this will be for waste.
Sorry about this rambling, but I needed to just write it somewhere and tumblr was up!
Need to look at the big picture. What is important in the long run? When I look back at this situation now, what will make me think that I handled this right? 5 years from now, will I care about how this went down? Things to ask myself.
Since I was bored at work this morning and didn’t have time to do makeup earlier I decided to take pictures of the process. Nothing too interesting, just killing some time.